Reflections on Early Motherhood

Sorry, no pictures this time(Mike has the camera with him in the Philippines–I am sure pictures will be posted as soon as he returns). Below are just some words for thought from a new mom who is still trying to figure out what in the world has happened to her world.

Today I found myself reflecting on motherhood in an email to a friend. When I finished the email I thought I would continue my reflections, as they were leading me to some interesting realizations.

Having Jacob has really turned my little life around. I know that marriage for some is a little tough in the beginning because of all the flaws that come out when forced to live with someone day in and day out (i.e. selfishness, stubbornness, pride…). Let me tell you, having a child will bring out the blemishes even more–a good thing because it is refining, but hard because I have had to face the fact that I am not as “good” as I thought I was. Having to give much of my time and thoughts to my little one is the ultimate test in sacrifice and giving up my desires and wants to meet his needs. God has been teaching me a lot through this, and I pray that someday those of you who do not have children yet will be able to have precious little ones because the best thing I have learned from this experience, so far, is to see myself how God sees me, as a child who cannot do anything on my own and is in need of His 24 hour assistance.

Upon further reflection, this question came to mind: Why, God, didn’t you just stick to the creating of man from dust? That would have saved us women a lot of pain, and our husbands a lot of time and confusion(because they wouldn’t have to adjust to our ever changing hormone levels all the time)! I am sure that we could all come up with some pretty good reasons as to why God chose to bring life through the act of childbirth. So, here are a few that I came up with:

1) We are called to learn to live as the “family” of Christ. How would we know what this meant if we didn’t have a family unit to live with and love?

2) We are called to love sacrificially. Loving in such a way is hard do to unless you have to. There is little else that can make one do this like taking home an infant who can do nothing for himself, and committing to raising him through the good and the bad.

3) We get to live a life of purity (in God’s eyes) because He gave Christ for our impurities. “How great the Father’s love for us; how vast beyond all measure. That he would give his only Son to make a wretch his treasure.” How could I begin to imagine the vastness of this sacrifice if I didn’t know the love a Father (or mother) has for his child? Would I give up my son to make the lives of someone else’s children perfect? This is hard to comprehend, but as a mom I can at least start to get the picture.

4) We are called to be a people of compassion. I must say that compassion was not one of my strengths prior to childbirth (you can ask any of my students or the runners on the Dragon cross country team). There was a tenderness placed in my heart when Jacob arrived, and it wasn’t just for him, but for all children. I have, more than once, been on the verge of tears just thinking about children without moms and dads–children who don’t get to learn God’s character traits through having an example of His love here on earth (Thanks Mom and Dad for being this to me; I am truly blessed).

5) We are called to live in the Spirit and produce the fruit of the Spirit in our lives. I am pretty sure that in the short 6 months that I have been a mom, nearly all the character traits that make up the fruit of the Spirit have been required of me. This is due to the fact that an infant has endless needs, and the fact that I am still a wife, friend, sister, and daughter and must continue to balance these roles too (with much less sleep than I would like) while trying not to be self-centered. Many times I have failed to think or act in alignment with the fruit of the Spirit (hence the reality of the refining process of parenting), but now I am more aware of the need to live daily in the Spirit so that I can fail less and have victory more.

If you are still reading, I wonder if you might be able to add to this list?

I would continue with my writing, but I think I will save my thoughts for another post! I hope that perhaps the above will cause you to reflect on your role as a parent, if you have children. If you aren’t a parent, perhaps the above will cause you to reflect the amazing act of love your parents committed by raising you.

Happy St. Patrick’s Day

Make a free ecard – it’s easy!

March is Here!

Wow, is it March already?

Yay, the winter is mostly behind us, and we are looking forward to some warmer spring weather soon.

Last night we experienced our first very sleepless night in a long time. Jacob caught a cold and ended up waking up pretty much every hour. I think his longest stretch of sleep was for an hour and a half. I had somewhat forgotten what those first nights home from the hospital were like, but last night helped to remind me! Hopefully, Jacob’s cold will go away quickly–and mine too–so, we can get back to sleeping for at least a few hours in a row. Life is always a little bit more rosy in appearance when one has had enough sleep.

Last weekend Jacob and I completed our first 5km run. Of course he beat me, coming in just a second or two before me (that stroller really puts him at an advantage). I was happy to make it through without walking and in under 28 minutes. I am looking forward to future challanges of completing workouts and races with the added energy required for pushing a 20+ pound baby in a stroller. Maybe next time Mike can run with us so we can take turns pushing.

 

Jacob and I at the LASA 5km Fun Run.

In other breaking news, Jacob is taking well to solid foods. This is not really surprising considering he has to keep up with his rather large baby belly(check out the picture). So far, he has taken well to baby cereals, apple sauce, pureed carrots, and mashed sweet potatoes. Jacob has made no attempt at rolling yet, but does enjoy standing. Thus, the Exersaucer is his current favorite form of entertainment.

That is about it from the far East. Enjoy the pics and clips below.

That’s our little boy and his big belly!

One day when I couldn’t get Jacob back to sleep for his nap I decided to jump in his crib with him and see if it helped (it didn’t, but it made for some fun bonding time).

To start most mornings Mike likes to read to Jacob from his devotional Bible. This was one such morning.

Sometimes Jacob prefers to read his own books. The content is a little easier for him to grasp.

Jacob having fun in the Exersaucer.

Jacob laughing at his crazy mom.